I almost missed it. A cold, blustery day does not lend itself well to minute observations of the environment. My attention was focused on the black tar of the parking lot, specifically the next spot on which my shoe would fall, then the next, then the next.
I noticed it with a flicker of attention, then dismissed it. I needed to run one more errand. I was tired and cold. I was grumpy. I resented the trip to the pharmacy in the first place. When was I ever going to get to be normal again? I know, I know, this is my New Normal. Eff that. "How are you? You look great!". I didn't look great, I looked tired and pinched and grumpy. I had made minimal grooming efforts that morning. What they meant is "Wow, you're not dead yet!" My grumpy self thought "Nope, not dead yet. Just dealing with all this cancer crap. How are you? Oh, the line was longer than you expected? So sad."
My mind flickered back to that spot on the pavement. What was that? It looked like a guitar pick? I like music. I went back. I stared at it. I bent down and picked it up. I marveled that I could stand up after squatting. That was a new thing I had recently remastered after months at the gym. I noted that I could change my New Normal. Eff yeah!
I saw that it was a magnet, one of those thin flexible decorative magnets, not really strong enough to hold anything. It was dirty and scuffed up. I cleaned it off and flipped it over.
I found hope. Then I smiled. It was a reminder to me that hope can get lost in the daily grind of modern living. It is easily recovered when you take a moment to slow down and look around. Maybe you have to dig for it a bit. Spiff it up a bit. But it's there, if you look for it.
