**********Do NOT read if you are SQUEAMISH***********
This evening finds me prepping for my Barium Study that is scheduled for 8am tomorrow. The pharmacy gave me a prep kit meant for people with a full-length normally functioning bowel. This includes 4L (yes, that is liters, and yes, that is 4L, and yes, that is 2 big soda bottles) of Golytely. Golytely is a total misnomer. It should be named Gofiercely. You get 4L of the stuff to totally cleanse your entire bowel. I was thinking that since I have only part of my bowel connected at this time, that I would not need to consume the entire contents of a jug meant for people with 25 feet of intact bowel. The radiologist told me to use my own judgement, but he also cautioned me to be sure that I was clean or I would have to repeat the whole Study. Okay, here I go......
Since I have had the pleasure of bowel prepping before, I am finding that prepping with an ostomy pouch might actually be a superior technique. I do not have to run for the toilet. I get to sit on the couch and watch my pouch fill, then I calmly go to the bathroom and empty it. Not so bad.
I don't even have to watch, I can just slip a hand to my pouch and feel if it is full. A full pouch is warm. I have a built in hand warmer.
I can just stand above the toilet and drain my pouch. I have always wanted to use the toilet standing up. I now understand the perils involved with aim. Ladies, it is not as easy as it seems.
I usually avoid eating eggs, but it was a choice on the limited diet I was offered. Eggs do not really break down. It's impossible to chew them completely and the larger bits tend to clog the works. Those bigger bits are now shooting out with enough force to make a whacking sound on the pouch. It kinda tickles and makes me laugh. I do not remember laughing during my last bowel prep.
Oh, Dr. Radiologist, my bowels will be clean. Please be kind to me.
**UPDATE**
Dr. Radiologist only took x-rays of my lower bowel, with contrast achieved with a barium enema. My whole prep procedure was a total waste of time and resources. Healthcare system FAIL! At least I lost about 4 pounds. :/
